BIG GIRL Kindergartener (or, The Sleepwalking Urinator)

The only thing funnier than a cross-looking sleepwalking kindergartener is a cross-looking sleepwalking kindergartener who fell asleep after a bedtime shower with her wet hair in a braid, which is now sticking straight up over her head like a rhinoceros horn. Seeing her, it's hard not to feel like it's the braid-horn that is displeasing her, even though you know she's not aware of it.

But I'm jumping ahead. Kindergarten started last week, and Ms. I-am-TOO-a-big-kid was in her glory. After the first day, it was as if all of her suspicions that she really is as old as her siblings  - or at least as capable - were confirmed in her mind. After all, she went to the bus stop. She rode the bus. She ate lunch - two of them in fact. (She bought hot lunch even though she and Randy had carefully packed her Hello Kitty lunchbox. She ate that lunch for snack.) She had recess. She went to gym. She rode the bus home. It seemed her dreams of achieving the same independence Ethan enjoys had finally come to fruition. Sure, she can't drive yet, but that's probably just months away, right?

When my older kids came home from Kindergarten, they needed time to decompress every day. All that activity was exhausting! Ethan sat at the table and drew pictures. Abby wouldn't speak two words to me and disappeared into her room. (Later I would hear the muffled sound of doll dialogue in her different voices.) Gracie snuggled next to me on the sofa and tried to sneak her thumb into her mouth.

Mira hopped off the bus, yelled "See ya!" to the neighbors and informed me, "I'm going to see if Alec is free." (Alec is our sixth grade neighbor who patiently teaches Mira basketball moves and other important sports skills every five-year-old girl needs to learn.)

Whoa whoa whoa! -- can you tell me a little about Kindergarten?

I couldn't believe she wasn't tired. I know she runs at full steam all day.

But she was tired. It became evident when she sleepwalked the first night. And every night thereafter the first week of school.

Yep, that's a tired Kindergartner!

Besides the sticking-up braid incident, Mira's sleepwalking involved:

• Going into our room and sitting on the bed (no one was in the room)
• Hiding behind Ethan's door
• Climbing into bed with Gracie
• Using the toilet and then standing on her stool to wash her hands. Except her stool was nowhere near the sink, so she just stood there with her hands out.
• Nearly giving Abby heart failure when Abby stepped into our bedroom to grab a hairbrush and caught sight of Mira sitting on our closet floor.

When she has these nocturnal adventures, she looks like the classic sleepwalker: glazed-over expression, staggering steps, deep confusion... In short, like a diminutive drunkie. Usually she seems to be looking for the bathroom, so Randy took to referring to her as the Sleepwalking Urinator.

She's raring to go again in the morning, bursting at the seams to get out to the bus stop. When I let her go she races outside and calls, "Hey, guys!" to the big kids. But not before she gets a kiss goodbye from me. She has her lips in a big, earnest pucker all the way across the room as she runs toward me for the kiss. So incredibly sweet. I'm so glad she's five, even if she doesn't think she is.